Reacting to The UK’s Top 10 Christmas Ads Part 1 - Reaction Time 021

Reacting to The UK’s Top 10 Christmas Ads Part 1 – Reaction Time 021

by | Dec 16, 2022 | Christmas, Reaction Time

Click through to the good bits.

00:00 Introductions/Catch-ups.

03:32 A definitive ranking of 2022’s Christmas adverts.

04:00 Marks & Spencer.

09:56 Tesco.

12:55 Lidl.

22:03 Aldi.

25:00 McDonald’s.

00:00 Introductions/Catch Up

Martin Henley: [00:00:15] Hello there. My name is Martin Henley. This is The Effective Marketing content extravaganza and if this is your first time here, you won’t know that I’m on a mission to give you everything you need to be successful in your business. Providing, of course, what you need to be successful in your business is to know more about and implement more enthusiastically, effectively and efficiently sales and marketing in your business. Which is, of course, what you need if you’re going to be more successful, you need more customers, more profitably. I’m here giving you everything I know about sales and marketing. I pull in anyone I can find with experience of sales and marketing to share with you as part of the Talk Marketing series. Melanie Farmer comes along every other week and we speculate wildly about what the marketing news might mean for your marketing career or your marketing in your business. We react to the very best and the very worst of marketing content on the Internet, and that’s what today is about. So if all of this sounds like it might be interesting and useful, please God, tell me it does, then you should take a second to, like, share, subscribe and comment and get involved because that will give us the motivation to continue on this epic journey. But like I say, today is Reaction Time and today is Christmas time. So what’s happened is I’ve bought in the wonderfully Christmassy, Jim Cunliffe.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:01:32] Good morning.

Martin Henley: [00:01:33] Good morning Jim. Shall we pretend we just didn’t do this once and get it all wrong?

Jim Cunliffe: [00:01:37] Yeah.

Martin Henley: [00:01:38] Okay. Let’s pretend that. Cool. How are you feeling about Christmas, bro? You’re looking like you’ve got a nice Christmas hat, Christmas jacket, Christmas tree, Christmas is happening there.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:01:47] The presents are under the tree.

Martin Henley: [00:01:49] The presents are under the tree. That’s fantastic. There will be presents this year. That’s good. It’s looking a little bit sunny there. You’re sure we’re not faking this out and trying to pretend that it’s Christmas when we’re doing this in June.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:02:01] It’s sunny but it’s cold.

Martin Henley: [00:02:03] It’s sunny, but it’s cold. Okay, good. Well, we’ve got proof that it isn’t June because we’ve got a date on the Internet, which nobody can argue with. So we’re doing this. It’s Christmas. So what we’re doing, the plan is we are going to react to this year’s Christmas adverts. I think this is a new thing. There wasn’t such thing as Christmas adverts when I was a kid growing up. There were Christmas adverts but no-one gave a shit. But what I found is that time out have ordered the Christmas ads from 10 to 1. They’ve ranked them and we’re just going to enjoy them and see if they’ve got it right. So what we’re going to do?

Jim Cunliffe: [00:02:40] Yep.

Martin Henley: [00:02:41] Is there anything else you want to say before we get started?

Jim Cunliffe: [00:02:44] I don’t think, there’s no script. I’m just going with it.

Martin Henley: [00:02:48] No, this is the bit where you say, Thank you for having me. Martin. It’s a real pleasure to be here.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:02:52] Right. Well, Martin, I must say, I’m really, really happy to be here. So thank you for waking me up, getting me out of bed and ask me to dress in this suit. I usually don’t get out until December. But, you know, I’m happy.

Martin Henley: [00:03:05] That’s great. Have you heard Last Christmas yet? There’s a competition every year that a friend of mine runs on Facebook. The last person to hear last Christmas gets a prize.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:03:16] Is it being one or something like that?

Martin Henley: [00:03:18] I think it might be. Yeah. I didn’t know I’m not there, so I don’t really do Christmas anymore. This is as much Christmas as I’m going to get. So merry fucking Christmas, bro. Okay, good. All right, so let’s get on with this. Okay.

03:32 A definitive ranking of 2022’s Christmas adverts.

Martin Henley: [00:03:32] TimeOut have produced a thing. They’re calling it the definitive ranking of 2022’s Christmas adverts. And in 10th place, they’ve got that bastion of Christmas adverts, Marks and Spencers. They’ve ranked this in 10th place. Shall we have a look and see what we think? Play good. Okay, I’m pressing play. What we know is I have to press play twice. It’s a minute and 30 seconds.

04:00 Marks & Spencer.

Narrator: [00:04:00] Ooh. It’s Christmas and I need to find me a little friend. But not you. Oh, you. Oh, definitely not you. Oh, this could be fun. What’s going on? Is it playtime already? Merry Christmas, ducky. Christmas. I’m not exactly dressed for it. Hey, you look delightful. I. I suppose I do. Considering I’m chased around by that.

Martin Henley: [00:04:26] These are non-traditional Christmas characters, are they? I’ve not come across these Christmas characters before.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:04:33] It’s just Absolutely Fabulous, isn’t it?

Martin Henley: [00:04:37] Mean, it has got.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:04:39] It has. Does that mean I mean, it’s just the cast of Absolutely fabulous.

Martin Henley: [00:04:44] Is it?

Jim Cunliffe: [00:04:45] Yeah. Oh, that’s that blonde bird. And the other one’s the, you know, the French bird. Dawn French, or is it Saunders? One of them, whoever. Whoever was married to Lenny Henry. Do you not get that?

Martin Henley: [00:05:01] She wasn’t married to Leonie? Dawn French. Dawn French was married to Lenny Henry, but she didn’t write. It was Jennifer Saunders who wrote Absolutely fabulous.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:05:10] Oh, yeah.

Martin Henley: [00:05:11] Yes.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:05:13] Okay. Well, anyway, that’s the brunette and then you’ve got that blonde, is that blonde bird?

Martin Henley: [00:05:19] What’s her name?

Jim Cunliffe: [00:05:20] The posh one. Listen to her voice and look at her hair. Good, Good.

Martin Henley: [00:05:27] What is her name, though? Uh, my, my, my. Dawn French and Jennifer Saunders is one glorious effort. Now it’s French and Saunders. That’s what it is. It’s not Absolutely Fabulous at all. Is, for instance.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:05:41] But that character there, the duck, the duck with the stuffing coming out looks a bit like the old blond bird.

Martin Henley: [00:05:50] But it’s not. It’s definitely done. It says it here. Oh, no, it says it here. You’re not seeing it. My my. Dawn French and Jennifer Saunders is in one glorious advert. So now we know what it is. Now we know who it is, at least. All right. Okay, good. I don’t. I don’t feel like we have the popular culture references that do this. We’re just here misinforming people. Okay, so these are non-traditional, like the fairies. Quite chunky, can I say, with extraordinarily skinny legs. Is there is there a significance to that?

Jim Cunliffe: [00:06:22] Oh, that’s just normal. That’s. That’s like a gong. That’s a normal thing. Look.

Martin Henley: [00:06:25] Okay.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:06:27] This is a gonk.

Martin Henley: [00:06:30] So it’s based on the gonk?

Jim Cunliffe: [00:06:31] That’s what it’s just based on that kind of thing that you buy in a shop and you stick on your trees. It’s nothing. There’s no significance, I don’t think.

Martin Henley: [00:06:40] Well, I’ve never heard of a gonk before.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:06:44] Well, that’s what that is.

Martin Henley: [00:06:46] Okay. So I think what we’ve established is that we are wholly unqualified to be doing this. Okay, so let’s go on. Anyway So Fairy’s back and she’s joined by her new sidekick, Ducky. I don’t understand the significance of Ducky at Christmas. Anyway, it’s got the wonderment of Christmas music, isn’t it? So that’s nice.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:07:04] Press play.

Martin Henley: [00:07:06] Let’s play. Okay. And I turn my volume down. I need to turn my volume up when I’m speaking and down when it’s playing. Okay, let’s play.

Narrator2: [00:07:13] For all I get. Stuck. Oh. Oh, look at me. I’m falling apart. Looks like we need to fill you with some festive cheer. I suppose a mince pie could fill a hole or two. How about a slice of M&S collection, perfectly matured cherry and orange liqueur Christmas pudding wreath? Well, that is a bit Christmassy. Look at these award-winning M&S mini steak Christina’s with caramelised onions. Oh, and this collection, Christmas sourdough loaf with dried cranberries and sage. That’s something to sink your beak.

Martin Henley: [00:07:56] This all looks absolutely delicious, doesn’t it? I want to eat all of this. But you can’t just say, Here’s the thing. Thingy. Thingy. Christmas thing. Like the steak croutons. When did steak croutons become a Christmas thing? They look amazing. I mean, this is a luxurious Christmas we’re talking about here, isn’t it? Okay.

Narrator2: [00:08:14] Can do. That’s the spirit. Or this is the spirit of man’s slow gin. Yum. Ooh. We are going to have the bestest Christmas ever. Yes, but I think I might celebrate it up here on the sideboard, if that’s okay. This is not just food. This is mass Christmas food.

Martin Henley: [00:08:33] Okay, So do we want to come in? I want to buy all of that stuff. That is a really effective ad. That’s what I think.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:08:41] I suppose with all this stuff is literally just sandwiching it. There’s the product and let’s just sandwich it with and try and win this best Christmas advert. Yes. So there’s always been Marks and Spencers, Lewis, John Lewis and Tesco. Yeah, maybe so. And now they’re all doing it, and they’re pumping so much money in.

Martin Henley: [00:09:04] Yes, but I think because, for me, the marketing is also the product is marketing.Product development for me is marketing. It looks to me like they’ve got absolutely fantastic product. And I want to buy it all. It all looks absolutely delicious. And, you know, we know that Marks and Spencers food is delicious. So I think that’s a highly effective ad. I can’t believe that’s in 10th place. I can’t believe this is going to get better than that.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:09:31] I think we’ll find that the rest of them have stories around them and, you know, meaning and. Okay. So that’s as far as selling product. That does the trick for me.

Martin Henley: [00:09:42] That does the trick for me. I want to get fat and drunk on Marks and Spencers food and drink at Christmas because of that ad. I can imagine if I’d seen that ad 30 or 40 times in the run up to Christmas. Sure. Okay, good. Right

09:56 Tesco.

Martin Henley: [00:09:56] So at number nine, we have the Tescos offering, like you say, Tesco’s also a mainstay of the Christmas ads and this one is a Christmas Party Broadcast. Oh, God.

Narrator3: [00:10:12] Britain, there’s a joy shortage. So we at Tesco have formed the Christmas Party to help. We promise more pigs in more blankets for more people. Award winning wines that deliver on budget. The only thing is we’ll cut our prices and cake. We’re bringing adult and kids tables together. If there’s a spare party hat, put it on the dog. And a referendum to see if Love Actually is the greatest Christmas film.

Narrator: [00:10:40] No, actually on party food buys for £1.12 and all bad times to be strong.

Narrator3: [00:10:49] We made dinner for five for under 25 quid. We’ll solve the things that matter.

Narrator2: [00:10:56] When he’s been there.

Narrator3: [00:10:58] Today, Jeffrey. Yeah. Today? We stand for joy. We are the Christmas party brought to you by Tesco.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:11:12] I love that one. I’ve never seen that one.

Martin Henley: [00:11:15] Have you not seen that one? You love it?

Jim Cunliffe: [00:11:16] No, I love it because it’s just. It’s just so. Taking the piss out of what’s going on right now.

Martin Henley: [00:11:23] Yes. I mean, politics is an unholy mess. Like, really, it’s an unholy mess and the world is too politicised. I don’t know how I feel about that.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:11:37] I think I’ll vote for them. If they were a real party, I’d vote for them.

Martin Henley: [00:11:41] Okay, good. Maybe because the others are all so appallingly bad. Okay, so that’s interesting. Like more traditionally Christmas for me, pigs in blankets, scrapping bedtimes, didn’t know that went on. Okay, so good. Interesting new take different Christmas Party. Everyone wants a Christmas party. I think that’s good. Okay, good. They’ve got that in number nine. I think we’re only really going to be able to rank these when we’ve seen them all. Okay. So is that better than Marks and Spencers, though? We can ask answer that question right now.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:12:16] It’s a total different it’s different gravy. That is totally different gravy.

Martin Henley: [00:12:20] Better gravy.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:12:22] Well, you know, most of us are pushing food. They were pushing every product range. They were pushing the clothing, the dogs, pets, toys. You know, everything was covered.

Martin Henley: [00:12:31] Oh, was it? I probably wasn’t paying attention enough. I would have said I thought it was product-like is what I thought it was. I would have.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:12:38] I would think it was just it was Omni product, not just just oral. Good.

Martin Henley: [00:12:48] You mean food?

Jim Cunliffe: [00:12:50] Yeah. Stuff you’ve put in your mouth?

Martin Henley: [00:12:52] Yeah. Stuff you put in your mouth. Okay, good. All right.

12:55 Lidl.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:12:55] So I think this might be my favourite. Not that I’ve seen them all, but I do love this one. And I love what Lidl are doing. I’m not sure it’s real, but I see. I was in Lidl the other day and there was the jumper, the jumper that we’re going to see on the bear. It was there on the shelf and it wasn’t in his normal place. It was like normally middle aisle or something like that. But no, this was just draped over some chocolates. I checked the size because I’m like, Well, if it was an extra large, I’ll have it but it was it was a medium, so I didn’t buy it and I found one on Vintage the other day, Lidl, Little Bear’s jumper. Again, it didn’t fit, so I didn’t buy it. But I would expect these things to be going. I mean, they’ve been selling trainers and all sorts.

Martin Henley: [00:13:40] Have they?

Jim Cunliffe: [00:13:41] Yeah, yeah, yeah. Lidl trainers. I mean, it’s retro. It’s like it might be a joke, but people are buying them because when they go in the Lidl, are people going and buying ten pairs and Ebaying them.

Martin Henley: [00:13:52] Really. Well, that is interesting because so what they’re doing is then they’re building hype around. Different products.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:14:01] Is that what you think? It’s a bit like your, you know, the, you know, the Christmas jumper that’s based on a Tesco, the old Tesco shopping bag, basic crap. It’s now just Lidl. So it’s like it’s budget, but it’s quite cool and it’s like really… and you know, that kind of Christmas jumper look, I mean, like the bear we’re going to see in a minute.

Martin Henley: [00:14:19] It’s Yeah, yeah, yeah. I feel like we need to see the bear.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:14:22] The thing is, I think you bear a while.

Martin Henley: [00:14:24] But I remember the last time I went to Lidl, I was absolutely furious and I phoned my wife afterwards and said, Look, I’m never shopping in Lidl again. I am not this poor. I was absolutely furious. I don’t know if they’ve upped their game since then. I don’t know if it’s become less annoying, but it’s just like I didn’t know any of the products and they weren’t. They weren’t positioned in great places. And then. I don’t know. This shows you how long ago it was like you had to pay for a bag or some shit. I don’t know. All right, let’s not get on my experience of Lidl. Let’s see what they are up to now in 2022. Are you ready? I’m expecting some Christmas jumper type action.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:15:04] Oh, yeah.

Narrator: [00:15:06] All my jumper.

Narrator3: [00:15:09] What’s wrong here? We never intended to create a Christmas character. It just happened and one big Christmas shop later, a new stuffed star was born. Some sort of little bear.

[00:15:22] Okay, little bear. Happy surprise.

Narrator3: [00:15:27] Suddenly its furry face was everywhere.

[00:15:35] Things get a little bad.

Narrator3: [00:15:36] Fame can get in the way of what really matters.

Narrator: [00:15:40] They know bad.

Narrator3: [00:15:45] A little girl missed her bear.

Narrator: [00:15:48] Come home.

[00:15:50] Come home back, Come home by.

Narrator3: [00:15:54] Christmas day Came with everything she could wish for. Even a little little bear, big hug. Tasty food narrative complete. Now that’s Christmas you can believe in.

Martin Henley: [00:16:08] Okay, That’s really good.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:16:09] You see? You see?

Martin Henley: [00:16:11] Yeah. Yeah, I do see.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:16:13] And if you have a Google, have a Google on the, you know, the Lidl trainers and things like that, it’s brilliant. And that very, very product light that was.

Martin Henley: [00:16:23] Very product light.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:16:25] But this, this game isn’t. Sorry.

Martin Henley: [00:16:30] Very compelling.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:16:33] I think it’s just like, you know, the food’s there, it’s subliminal. It’s all about the bear.

Martin Henley: [00:16:39] Yes. And it’s interesting because they did that little reverse psychology thing. We didn’t mean to create this hype around this Christmas character. It’s their history with this Christmas character. Is it new this year or is it.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:16:50] The Bears New. The Bears new, but the Lidl clothing? Well, that’s quite reasonably new. The trainers came out in the summer or something like that. And this is the jumper is a thing. I haven’t seen anyone wearing it. I mean, because like in December, you know, in a few months’ time, everyone will be wearing their festive gear at the networking events. And I haven’t yet seen into the future and seen anyone wearing a Lidl jumper.

Martin Henley: [00:17:13] Right like this. Oh, there’s a baldy. Oh, no, you’re not seeing it. Let me show you. All right, so there’s a baldy thing. That’s not. That’s like little, little nuggets. The jumper, is it?

Jim Cunliffe: [00:17:27] Do we know where?

Martin Henley: [00:17:29] Yeah. But this is Vestiaire collective. Except $60 for a. Look. Um, $60 for a jumper. Dollars. Where are they selling this? In the store. What’s. Lidl jacket, Lidl socks, Lidl socks, Lidl Christmas jumper, $91. $35 for a pair of socks. So is this what you’re saying? They’ve opened up like a black market now for Lidl clothing.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:18:04] Can you just search Lidl trainers?

Martin Henley: [00:18:08] Can. Lidl trainers. Oh, wow. Okay. So this is what Lidl trainers look like. With Lidl socks.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:18:25] Like. Like worse than Gola.

Martin Henley: [00:18:28] Worse than gold. Yeah. To be fair, Gola was in the eighties. Like, trainers have come on since then.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:18:34] But this is a piss take, isn’t it? I mean, it’s just a piss take. But for the piss take, I think. Yeah. To say I’ve got a pair of Lidl trainers and then putting it on Facebook and like hey look at this. I don’t know, but you know, I don’t know.

Martin Henley: [00:18:51] Okay, who makes the hottest trainers? Lidl. But you’ll have to run the discount supermarkets branded footwear sold out online. This is back in September £12.99. That’s not very much money for a pair of shoes.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:19:04] Yeah, but that’s little nothings. Much, much.

Martin Henley: [00:19:07] At £35 each, while others have put together packages of trainers, socks and boardshorts. One customer complained they had visited five different stores on the day the trainers went on sale, but left empty-handed as they were all sold out. Lidl has said it’s investigating how so many of them went on to be resold for two or three times the retail price, with some users listing them for several hundred pounds. We’re aware of this issue and it’s currently being investigated internally. Okay, Well, I didn’t know anything about this. I didn’t know anything about this at all. So somehow Lidl have turned themselves into a hype machine. That’s what’s gone on. Wow.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:19:47] It’s so cringey, that it’s just funny and just you know what I mean? I don’t think it’s about owning them, not wearing them.

Martin Henley: [00:19:54] Right.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:19:56] Because they’re too bad to wear.

Martin Henley: [00:19:59] I don’t know if this is fair to say. I could imagine you wearing a pair of shoes like that. I think I’ve seen you in shoes that don’t look very, very different from that, trainers.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:20:10] Oh, no, I wouldn’t wear them.

Martin Henley: [00:20:13] I don’t know. I just imagine you’re in a pair of £12.99 trainers.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:20:18] I might pay 12.99. But just like, you know, that’s just because I’m TK Maxxing.

Martin Henley: [00:20:24] Okay, good. I thought you might require trainers that look something like that. Okay. But only in number eight. So we’re not making great progress here in number eight. That’s a.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:20:33] Great ad. I mean, I must say, that’s probably the one I’ve seen the most of.

Martin Henley: [00:20:37] But what’s interesting for me, that had a very kind of British sensibility about it and I don’t know, is Lidl, is it Scandinavian? Is it German?

Jim Cunliffe: [00:20:48] It’s a German, Is it two brothers, one’s Lidl and one is Aldi and they fell out and they go head to head.

Martin Henley: [00:20:54] I had no idea of that either.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:20:56] I mean, you know, I mean the whole I think Tesco, it’s like Tesco is it like the Aldi price match. They do an Aldi price match. So it’s like everyday runners, it’s all about Aldi price match. It’s like, Well thanks for that, I’ll go to Aldi then. I didn’t know, you know, I mean it’s like it seems mad that these, the supermarkets are name-checking competitors to say that they’re price matching. So that doesn’t sound like a very good way to…. It’s a bit, I suppose, it’s a bit like the Conservative Party and Labour, you know, slagging each other off in each other’s adverts.

Martin Henley: [00:21:28] Yes, yes, yes.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:21:30] It’s productive because like I’ve never been to Aldi, I didn’t know it was the same price. So if you’re saying it’s the same price and maybe I need to go there and visit and see what else is cheaper?

Martin Henley: [00:21:41] If you’re saying this to me on the telly, then maybe I should go look at it. Check it out. All right.

22:03 Aldi.

Martin Henley: [00:22:03] Anyway, so up next, there’s. There may be Lidl’s brother Aldi. So that’s what’s coming next in at number seven, they outdid Lidl, clearly starting a whole hype around this, this teddy bear. Okay, good.So Aldi, let’s see, this looks very Christmas.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:22:05] I’ve never seen this one. Maybe it’s the channels I watch. Maybe the TV channels. I watch Lidl’s always on there and Aldi just don’t use those channels.

Martin Henley: [00:22:16] Maybe I don’t know. Let’s have a look. Let’s see what’s going on.

Narrator: [00:22:24] But come on, everyone.

Narrator3: [00:22:27] Is too heavy.

Narrator: [00:22:28] For me. Can I get my pocket money? They’re helping families in need. Merry Christmas, everyone.

Narrator3: [00:22:35] Christmas in Paris. A family vacation but wasn’t someone missing from this festive celebration? For this little carrier.

Martin Henley: [00:22:45] It’s home alone.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:22:47] Where’s Dad? There’s no Kevin. Where’s Dad?

Narrator3: [00:22:50] Would spend Christmas.

Martin Henley: [00:22:54] This might be a non-nuclear family.

Narrator: [00:22:56] Come on, everyone. One night.

Narrator3: [00:22:58] Is too heavy.

Narrator: [00:22:59] For me.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:23:00] Can I keep your mama?

Narrator: [00:23:02] They’re helping families in need.

Martin Henley: [00:23:03] That’s Dad.

Narrator: [00:23:04] Christmas, everyone.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:23:05] You’re still.

Narrator3: [00:23:06] In Paris? A family vacation. But wasn’t someone missing from this festive celebration?

Martin Henley: [00:23:14] Yeah. This one on the right is Dad. I think. I don’t know why he’s smaller than.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:23:17] His voice for that.

Martin Henley: [00:23:19] What’s that?

Jim Cunliffe: [00:23:20] You got a ridiculous voice for a dad.

Martin Henley: [00:23:23] It’s a carrot.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:23:25] Yeah, but it should be, like, manly.

Martin Henley: [00:23:26] Yeah. You’ve got no idea what carrots sound like. Don’t pretend like you know what carrots sounds like.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:23:31] Roll the tape.

Narrator3: [00:23:33] Little carrot would spend Christmas at home, and he often get scared when left all alone, quaking in his roots, he had to make a stand. And tackle the intruder with traps he carefully planned. But then all of a sudden he had a bright idea. Which almost dashed his hopes of seeing in New Year.

Narrator: [00:24:09] Most.

Narrator3: [00:24:11] Fearing that his plans had left him quite exposed, he made a hasty exit to become a snowman’s nose.

Narrator: [00:24:20] Kevin. Thank goodness you’re here. Someone’s been trying to get in.

Narrator3: [00:24:26] But even though Kevin was a little worse for wear, he was overjoyed to have everybody there.

Narrator: [00:24:33] I’m sorry about Paris. At least we got to see the Eiffel Tower.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:24:37] Kevin’s the dad.

Martin Henley: [00:24:38] Kevin is the dad. Plot twist.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:24:41] Yeah.

Martin Henley: [00:24:43] I’ll bet he was really happy thinking that he had Christmas off.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:24:46] Get rid of the kids. Okay.

Narrator3: [00:24:49] Let’s see.

Martin Henley: [00:24:52] Kevin is the dad. I take it all back? You clearly know exactly what a carrot Dad sounds like. Man, I’m sorry.

Narrator3: [00:24:57] Ding for everyone.

25:00 McDonald’s.

Martin Henley: [00:25:00] Okay, good. Is that better? I don’t know if that’s better or worse. I think we should roll through these because we are spending a lot of time. Okay. Mcdonald’s is missing, Video unavailable. This video is private.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:25:15] Oh, dear. Okay, I find it. Where else?

Martin Henley: [00:25:19] Okay, let’s go find it. Okay. Youtube, McDonalds Christmas ad 2022. The list is this did it look like it was called the list? One of the weirder sides of the annual cavalcade of Xmas adverts. One year ago, one month ago, it’s this one.

Narrator: [00:25:56] Why don’t you make a Christmas list? A list? Looking for a window?

Martin Henley: [00:26:03] That kid really loves a list. Hey, is it? It’s too big. Should I make it smaller? How’s that looking?

Jim Cunliffe: [00:26:12] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Martin Henley: [00:26:13] There you go. Like that. Okay, good. Um, all right.

Narrator: [00:26:19] Well, it’s like a story of love. Can you keep Christmas for me? Came back only yesterday. I’m moving further away. What you need? All I needed was a love you gave. I need it for another day. And all I ever knew. Only you. All the Christmas. So think. It’s only a game. And I need. And you. Listen to the words that you say. It’s getting harder to stay. When I see. Well, all I needed was the love you gave. What was on your list, anyway? Need it for another day. And all I ever knew. Only you.

Martin Henley: [00:27:34] Are you reindeer ready? Well I think…

Jim Cunliffe: [00:27:38] You didn’t even see a burger there. You didn’t even see a burger.

Martin Henley: [00:27:42] You didn’t even see a burger. I think that’s an abomination. I think that’s the most depressing Christmas ad I have ever seen in my life.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:27:51] Well, he went to all that effort and then it blew away. And the mom’s like, Fuck it, I’ll just get my McDonalds done. All the shit that’ll do it.

Martin Henley: [00:27:58] Yes.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:27:59] And it did like it does with every kid. Every kid, just like, you know.

Martin Henley: [00:28:05] Gets happier when they’ve got a McDonald’s burger. Yeah, well, I suppose if you believe at all the conspiracy, that they’re making us all miserable so we just fill ourselves up with junk food, then maybe they’re nailing it, there McDonald’s. But I wouldn’t have thought that would be Now would be the time. Christmas time. What’s the song?

Jim Cunliffe: [00:28:29] Oh, it’s. It’s Alison Moyet, isn’t it?

Narrator: [00:28:35] Dee dee dee dee doo.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:28:38] Flying pickets did it back in the eighties.

Martin Henley: [00:28:40] Pickett’s is it. Yeah.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:28:42] I think it’s Alison Moyet or someone like that.

Martin Henley: [00:28:45] Yeah, it’s only had that one. I’ve closed it now because I was so disgusted. It’s only had like 150,000 views. So what’s the point?

Jim Cunliffe: [00:28:53] Nobody’s pulling through there, does it?

Martin Henley: [00:28:55] No. Mcdonald’s is clearly the worst one.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:29:00] So I mean this is Sainsbury’s because of the orange, you can tell that. McDonald’s isn’t a supermarket, it isn’t a department store. It’s only selling oral and it’s not even selling stuff you can go and cook. So it’s really, you know, what’s that doing? Is it this is just awareness, isn’t it?

Martin Henley: [00:29:19] Yeah, really. For me, Christmas has absolutely nothing to do with McDonald’s. You know, if you’re in McDonald’s at Christmas, are they open now at Christmas time? Are they open on Christmas Day? No.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:29:30] I don’t know.

Martin Henley: [00:29:31] It’s only going to be a matter.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:29:32] No one leaves the houses, do they? Why would you?

Martin Henley: [00:29:36] I think people do leave their houses. This is what’s going on now. I think.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:29:39] Well, go to McDonald’s for Christmas Day.

Martin Henley: [00:29:43] I think it might start happening. If it’s not happening, it’s only a matter of time. It’s not what it used to be. Christmas one. Well, I remember you weren’t allowed to leave the house like, categorically not. If you got a bike for Christmas, you weren’t allowed to go out and ride on your bike. That’s what I remember. Okay, good. Should we go to Sainsbury’s? We’re only at the halfway mark.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:30:00] Shall we go? This? I think this one’s full of big, Big Brother Rejects.

Martin Henley: [00:30:07] Is it okay, We might split this into a part. Into a two part thing? I think so. People might need to come back. So welcome back. If this is the second part, because we’ve gone on for we have literally been going for half an hour already. All right. Okay.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:30:19] What’s up, Martin?

Martin Henley: [00:30:21] What’s that.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:30:23] Number? If this was number six, that would be half way. You can’t go halfway at number five. You got to play number five. And then that’s half way.

Martin Henley: [00:30:31] It’s not, though, is it?

Jim Cunliffe: [00:30:33] Do your maths.

Martin Henley: [00:30:34] Ten, nine, eight, seven, six. That’s one five, four, three, two, one.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:30:40] Right. And you’ve just welcome them back on to number five.

Martin Henley: [00:30:44] You’re a second five.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:30:47] You’re premature. No. Five. There you go. Five. This is the fifth one.

Martin Henley: [00:30:52] So after nine, be welcome. Eight, seven, six. End of part one, five, four, three, two, one. And a show.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:31:04] Right. You just explained it yourself that this isn’t the first one of the next lot. This is the last one of the first lot.

Martin Henley: [00:31:10] No, I haven’t. I’ve just explained it exactly.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:31:13] Tell you just.

Martin Henley: [00:31:14] Nine, eight, seven, six. That’s five. That’s half. Stop. Yeah, we’re stopping. We’re welcoming them back now for number five. No, five, four, three, two, one. Yes.

Jim Cunliffe: [00:31:26] One, two, three, four, five. Why are you counting backwards?

Martin Henley: [00:31:29] Because we’re counting down from number ten.

Narrator3: [00:31:34] One week later.

Martin Henley

Martin Henley

Martin has built a reputation for having a no nonsense approach to sales and marketing and for motivating audiences with his wit, energy, enthusiasm and his own brand of audience participation. Martin’s original content is based on his very current experience of running effective marketing initiatives for his customers and the feedback from Effective Marketing’s successful and popular marketing workshops.







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